Our 20’s is said to be our selfish years. The time when we can carve out a career, somewhat unburden our parents and basically, so whatever we damn well please.
Sounds great, doesn’t it? But for myself, and a lot of other people my age, we put so much pressure on ourselves to know exactly what we want to do and where we’re heading that our golden years get overshadowed.
It has been about a month and a half since I finished my NCTJ Journalism course, and to be truthful, I’m at a little bit of a loss with myself. I’ve always been the type to never stand still. I love being busy, and while I’m searching for a job to start my career, I can’t help feeling like time is moving too quick.
I’m only 20, a baby in many peoples eyes, but I still can’t help thinking that I should have my career planned out and started already. I know a lot of people feel like this, and it makes me wonder, is this feeling of not being where we should be limited to my generation, or have people felt these pressures no matter what era they where born in?
Like it or loathe it, social media is now a massive part of our lives. As great as it is having all of the accessibility in the world, its very easy to compare your situation to others. After feeling a little down in the dumps for the past few days, I decided enough was enough, after all, Rome wasn’t built in a day, was it?
There is an abundance of articles online giving advise to us 20 somethings, basically telling us to chill the hell out. I’ve surfed through a ton of these and I have to say, they help! Here are a few of my favourite tips I’ve read that will hopefully put your situation in to perspective:
“Stop worrying so much about what might happen in the future.”–Blair Stout, Advertising Coordinator
I am so guilty of doing this, and if you’re reading this, you probably are too. There comes a time when you just need to think, ‘fuck it’. Do whatever makes you happy at that given moment, for all you know, you could die on the bus home.
“Don’t waste your time trying to get someone to like you. Focus on surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good the way you are.” –Anna Breslaw, Sex and Relationships Writer, Cosmo.
Of course, you want people to like you in some capacity, but you can’t make everyone like you. If you don’t click with someone, that’s okay. What’s not okay is trying so hard to make them like you that you make yourself miserable. You deserve better. You be you.
“Everybody is as confused as you.” – Ran Zilca, Greatist.com It may seem like that girl you met on holiday once back in 2008 has a perfect, put together life on Instagram, and yes, you may be insanely jealous of her new puppy/car/apartment/whatever, truth is, no one can have their life perfect 100% of the time. Just know, everyone has felt confused, disheartened, hopeless at some stage of their life, and you will never be alone in that.
“Don’t be so focused on getting a job. Take a year off, travel cheaply, and have fun. The working world will still be there when you return.” –Jessica Matlin, Deputy Beauty editor, Cosmo.
FOMO (fear of missing out) doesn’t just apply to parties and fun things, you know. When you have too much time on your hands, and you are job searching, you can feel like you need to be on alert 24/7 just in case you miss out on that one application that may or may not have been your dream job. You know what? That’s not going to be something you remember when you’re 80 is it? Get out there, and make amazing memories while your’re not tied down.
“Do not let a job get in the way of your career. This is your life we’re talking about.” – Christina Berchini, Huffington Post. I feel like this piece of advise is tremendously important. It’s so easy to get sucked in to a job you aren’t passionate about when you see your bank account filling up, but how long will this keep you satisfied? You need to think about your happiness and fulfillment long term.
“Stop comparing yourself to your friends and peers.” – Odner Hassan, Lifehack.org.
While it’s good to have role models and ideals, it’s never healthy to frequently compare yourself with other people. Everyone has their own path to follow with different goals and ambitions. In the end, the only person you’re really in competition with is yourself.
I hope some of this advise might calm or inspire some of you, I know it has done for me. From now on, once I get that anxious feeling, I need to just take a look at my own advise, and chill the hell out.